Friday, June 24, 2011

Two Miracles through Open adoptions

Hello to all the amazing women and men out there that are involved in the adoption world!!
My name is Jaymie. I am a woman of MANY words. (I talk to much) I have debated on how to write our beautiful story of our family in a few paragraphs! Hey who says it has to be a few paragraphs? I will try and keep it as short and sweet as best as I can. 
1st greatest blessing of my life: My Hubby
 I married my high school sweetheart & the love of my life.  The man I KNOW I will be with for the eternities. The man that lights up my life.  The man I know my life will be filled with HUGE amounts of happiness, because he is a part of it. The man Heavenly Father knew I needed by my side to get through life’s ups and downs.  The man that held me while we dealt with our infertility, but also gave me the strength to strive to make a hard situation one that we could learn & grow from.
2nd greatest blessing of my life: My Daughter Henslee

After going through all the “fun” infertility treatments over and over we decided that if we were not pregnant by Jan 2009 we would start the adoption process.  Oh wait, did I say "fun" I meant the worst not fun thing of my life! Well, January came around and no pregnancy. The adoption process started. We were so excited.  We planned on going into it wanting a very closed adoption. We wanted to be able to have our “Own” family. We wanted to say Thank you to the birth mom and then run with our little bundle of joy in the other direction.  We were able to attend the adoption academy in February to start our adoption journey. After the academy our hearts were changed. We came away wanting so bad to have an open adoption. I wrote in my journal that night............Today I was able to gain a greater understanding of Birth mothers. The love, sacrifice & uncertainty of placing their baby for adoption. I have a new strong love for them. I now realize this is a journey we will do together with our Birth moms. I want them to be a strong part of our family an important part. I am so lucky to to become a part of their lives and make it to the eternities with them. I couldn't do this journey without them. My family cannot start without them.

 We were then certified July 21st 2009.  Our profile went up and the very next day we were contacted by Lindsey a Birth mom. We quickly emailed her back. No response back from her. A few weeks later we were then chosen by another Birth mom in California. We were so excited. A few weeks went by and we were then contacted by our caseworker and were told she changed her mind and was not going to place with us. 
The very same night Lindsey emailed us back. A few days later she asked us to be the parents of her daughter. We were able to build an amazing relationship over the next few months leading up to the birth of Henslee.  My hubby and I were in the room when our daughter was born. It was the most incredible experience of my life. Words cannot describe the feeling I had when my daughter I had waited for looked at me for the first time. Time stood still.  
Henslee & her birthmom Lindsey
 Over the next few months we were able to continue our open adoption with Lindsey.  We were in love with our little Henslee and enjoying every second of being parents. Lindsey came over and visited frequently. We loved that Lindsey would be a part of Henslee’s life. We love Lindsey. We couldn’t imagine our adoption journey without her being in it.  Henslee is now 18 months old and getting cuter by the second. Lindsey has been an important  part of our lives through the entire process.We get to see Lindsey once or twice a month and look forward to seeing her each time..

3rd greatest blessing of my life: My Son Nixon

Henslee's birth mom Lindsey let me know in July of 2010 that her good friend Olesia was pregnant and thinking to place her baby for adoption. Lindsey told me that she was going to "talk" Olesia into placing her baby with us. We didn't think much of it because we were parents to a 7 month old baby : ) . The amazing thing is that we knew Olesia. She came to the hospital when Henslee was born. We have a picture of her with Henslee when Henslee was 2 days old. Lindsey and Olesia grew up across the street from each other. Well so a few months goes by and I was out to lunch with Lindsey. She brought up Olesia again. I have never felt a feeling so strong in my life, I knew that if Olesia was having a BOY I knew he would be a part of our family. So we didn't get our hopes up. But I did continue thinking about Olesia, constantly she was on my mind. A few months went by and I sent Lindsey a text message asking her if Olesia knew what she was having yet?? Lindsey then told me she just found out and that it was going to be a Little Boy! Wow chills all over my body.  Olesia wanted to meet and a few days later we went to dinner with Olesia. It was an amazing night. We felt like we had known Olesia forever. Olesia was also adopted from Russia a few years ago, so she is very familiar with the love, heart ache and feelings regarding adoption. After meeting with her I knew in my heart that she would be in our lives forever. We went to dinner a few nights later and that is when she asked us if we would be the parents of her Son. After a few months of getting to know Olesia, going to dinner, movies and ultra sounds we were able to gain a strong relationship with her.  Olesia gave birth to our Son Nixon in April of 2011.  She gave me the opportunity to be in the delivery room when he was born. I gained a deeper love for her watching her go through what she did to get Nixon here. Olesia took Nixon home until she signed papers.  The day she went home from the hospital we received a call from our case worker telling us that Olesia decided not to place and was going to parent instead. We were heart broken to say the least. Olesia decided she would think about it and let us know a few days later what her final decision was going to be. After a lot of prayers and miracles she signed papers at 72 hours.

Nixon & his Birthmom Olesia

We love Olesia. She is a strong person. Not alot of women are strong enough to do what she did. She loved Nixon more than anything in the world. I love that Nixon will always know of the love she has for him.  Nixon is now 8 weeks old and the cutest little man ever.

My Hubby, Me, Henslee & Lindsey
Olesia (pregnant with Nixon) Me, Henslee & my Hubby

Wow the adoption process is a roller coaster!! There is nothing anyone can say or nothing you can do to prepare your self for the emotions, good and bad that will come with your adoption journey. Having had 2 adoptions you would think we would’ve been better prepared  for our second adoption.  NOPE. Every Birth-mom is different, hence every adoption is different. Having an open adoption is a work in progress. We have had our fair share of ups and downs with both of our Birth-moms. But like any other relationship you have to work on it. We have worked and are still working on it and I can say we have an incredible relationship with both of them. I have a deep love  for each one of them and I cherish my  relationship with our Birth-moms. They are the reason I am a mommy today. I will forever be grateful to them for allowing me to raise and be the mommy to their precious children. The journey of adoption is Incredible. You will see the hand of the Lord through the entire process.  He gives us trials to test our faith, to build our relationship with him and to help us grow.   We are truly blessed to have the opportunity to be apart of the adoption process.  We love our OPEN adoptions.  We love our Birth-moms. 

Please contact me with any questions you have. My family blog is I love to talk about our adoptions. I wish I could share it with the entire world how Amazing adoption is.  Good luck in your adoption journeys! It will be the greatest journey of your lives.

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