Shane and Brittnee
Shane and I met in a fast food restaurant he was working at and settled the arrangements for our first date before we even bothered to ask each other’s names. We had an instant connection and were married on July 1, 2005 in the Columbia River Temple just four short months after meeting.
After marrying, we had the plan to finish college and wait at least two years before starting a family. After taking a course at BYU-Idaho though, we both agreed there was no reason to wait and we wanted to start our family right away. Months into our marriage our journey to bringing children into our family began. Naturally, as most of us do, we assumed it would be months before we became pregnant and we figured in a few short years we would have one or two little ones running around.
After about a year of trying we realized something was off. It was impossible to prepare for the possibility of not having children and as each month began and ended in frustration we became a little desperate and started convincing ourselves that this time it would happen. We continued with this line of thinking for the next year. Finally after two years, we knew something was definitely wrong. We fought our grief and our grief hardened our hearts, blocking us from making any decisions. We were not ready to accept defeat and so we pushed on, bitterly, for one more year, doing more damage to our spirits then we realized at the time.
Finally we understood that we needed to see a doctor. Little knowledge came from our visits and we felt hopeless. We didn’t understand how we could pay a doctor so much money and not have an answer as to why we couldn’t bear children. We went back and forth between decisions and were literally missing each other by weeks in our decision making. Shane would be on board to try something and I wouldn’t and then I would be on board to try something and Shane wouldn’t. We wrestled between adoption, further testing, giving up, and traveling aboard to run away from our pain. We even tried to start adoption processing twice before backing out because something was off. We learned that the timing for us just wasn’t right.
On March 16th 2010, our stars finally aligned and we both were reading from the same page. We were ready and adoption was absolutely right for our family. Like a clap of thunder, we were sitting in Sacrament meeting and peace washed over me as I knew our family was waiting for us, but that it would be through a different means than we expected. I turned to Shane, with tears in my eyes, and told him it was time to adopt. It took him a few days to have the strength in conviction as I had, but we contacted LDS Family Services right away and they were having their first orientation meeting in a few short weeks so we hit the ground running. Within nine weeks we were approved and online waiting on May 18, 2010. Everything came together and just clicked.
We look forward to starting our family through such an amazing way. We look forward to bonding with and loving our birth family. We understand our road has been a long one, but we pray for our birth mom and our baby each and every night as we wait for the next set of stars to align. In our six year struggle, we’ve learned some things are worth waiting for.
If you’d like to know more about us you can visit us at itsaboulove.org, profile ID 24679131, or follow the link
You can also follow us on our blog at www.shaneandbrittneefamily.blogspot.com
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